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Day #80 – 6 July 2012

My last day.

Last day! 😀

Mixed feelings? Not really. I was excited for class, to have the last lesson with the kids, because I had planned something fun for them, and prepared gifts and “awards” too! xD

But, no doubt about it, I was glad for it to be ending.

In the morning, the Muslim students had bacaan yasin so I thought I would take the chance to put some stuff in the Arts Room (stuff from Sports Day that has been sitting on and lying underneath my table for a week now =.=). Pn. Koh had actually informed me to come down for the assembly after the bacaan yasin but I didn’t expect to be stuck at the Arts Room with a student, looking for my file and pair of scissors that had gone missing since it was used for the March Past costumes and practices T.T

Anyway, I was late for the assembly! Everyone was waiting. Oops. :/

Worse, Sun could not be found nor contacted! I had no idea where she went, since I was at the Arts Room earlier, and she must not have brought her phone with her, cos I called and called but there was no answer :/ Hasrul had gone up to say a few words I think, but I didn’t get to hear him speak. I only arrived after that. Then, they presented me with so many gifts! The Teachers’ Club, the Choir Club, the English Language Panel etc.

I suddenly felt the urge to say something. I always get this strange anxious feeling when I feel there is something that I need to say/do. My heart starts beating really fast and I get a little breathless. They were almost ending the assembly already. Should I say something?

I asked Pn. Koh if it was possible for me to address the students and teachers. Just a few words. It was! :O So they gave me the floor. I thanked all the teachers for their guidance, and making me feel like a part of the SMK PP 14(1) family. Then I thanked all the students; although, this profession is very very challenging, I have had some sweet moments with all of them, moments that I will cherish and bring back with me. So, with the Principal’s permission, I would like to dedicate a song to all the teachers and students of SMK PP 14(1).

And I sang.

In front of everybody! :O

Just the chorus though, from Shila’s Memori Tercipta. I felt the lyrics were very apt:

Di sini jua

Memori tercipta

Walau seketika

Terjalin kasih kita

Mungkin di sini

Kita kan terpisah

Kenangan bersama

Tiada kulupa


When I had finished, the teachers told me they tak puas lagi dengar. (Later on, during the potluck the Teachers’ Club organized for us practical teachers, they requested me to sing again—the full song this time! @.@)

After the assembly, I was swarmed by students who had come to wish me well and say goodbye. Goodness, there were students already crying very badly, with teary eyes and runny noses. When I see that, I always feel like crying too. 😦 It made me sad, but it felt good to hug all of them, tell them not to cry, and to wish them the best in their studies.

I had some time before my classes, so I took the time to go round handing out the gifts that Sun and I bought for our guru pembimbing and Pn. Koh and a few other English teachers. Very small and simple gifts, as a token of appreciation for everything they’ve done for us 🙂 I felt quite sad and extremely grateful to Pn. Koh, but the usually stoic Sun actually cried! :O Understandable though, because Pn. Koh is one of the nicest, sweetest, most thoughtful person I have ever met. She “took care” of us more than our own guru pembimbing did, frankly :/ I will truly miss her 😦

I settled all the last minute matters, like handing over all my books and PBS sheets to Pn. Kartini and Pn. Shahril. I gave them my “work”sheet of when I recorded every time the students handed in their work to me. I had two columns for each book—for when they are on time, or late in handing in. And black/red-coloured pens for when their work was complete or incomplete. And shaded red boxes for when their work is unacceptably bad/shoddy. And also the complete list of everything that I had done with them in the past 16 weeks. Hope that that helps them to continue from there. 🙂

Also took the time to say goodbye and thank you to all the teachers, and to ask for forgiveness for anything that we might have said/done to hurt them. 😦 The rest, we said our goodbyes after the potluck lunch.


Class with 1 Buck and 1 Best were similar. The program was: 1) Chicken Goggles, 2) Awards Ceremony, 3) Last Words and finally, 4) Song: Count on Me. Both classes were laughing hysterically during the Chicken Goggles game! Uncomfortably loud, however. I was glad they were really enjoying themselves. But at the same time, I cringed every time Hamzah or Aswad screamed with laughter! @.@ I was so afraid of disturbing the other classes >.<

But they really seemed to enjoy the game. The reason why I never played it in class before was because it wasn’t really a language game. It was just an ice-breaking/for-fun kinda game. And it takes up time. More than half an hour to reach the Top 5 =.= I’m glad that they loved it so much though. Maybe they can play that together on their own next time 🙂

Then, I presented the awards. I gave 5 different awards: 1) Best Results (for the person with the highest marks for English for the Mid-Year exam), 2) Most Diligent (for the person who consistently handed in and did his/her work), 3) Most Participative (for the person who is most active and always volunteers in class), 4) Most Creative (for the most artistic person) and 5) Most Courteous (the student who is most polite and often offers to help me carry my things) 😀

For 1 Buck, the winners of the Awards were:

1) Ilham

2) Maisarah

3) Hamzah

4) Iffat

5) Azrina

And for 1 Best, the winners were:

1) Hannah

2) Nabihah

3) Aswad

4) Nisa

5) Hilman


I enjoyed giving them gifts of “certificates” and choki-choki chocolates and jellies 😛

Then, we had the Last Words. Speaking to them, I actually felt emotional, and for BOTH classes, there was a moment when I almost couldn’t speak because I was about to cry. But “thanks” to the boys who kinda made fun of me and some of the girls crying, I did not really cry. Couldn’t, really. When the boys made it into a funny matter =.= (Everything’s always funny with them >.<)

Then we sang the song together, took some photos. And that was it. My last two classes for my practicum! 😀

Now that it has ended, I can look back and see that I have learned a lot from this experience. It has been challenging, to say the least. Every single day was a challenge. It was exhausting, and frustrating. But we can only learn new things when things don’t go smoothly, isn’t that right? 🙂 I have learned from my kids, how to handle them, how to control them, how to draw them in. And I have tried my very very best to give them everything I had. I know I still have a lot to improve on, but it warms my heart when my kids tell me, “Teacher, you’re the best teacher I have ever had!” :’)

And they gave me such lovely gifts too! Here are some pictures:


Isn’t it all worth it in the end? One day, I hope to see them, successful and happy. I would be proud to say that they were my students, once. I sincerely wish them the best, and success.

We’ll keep in touch. On Facebook! 😉

One chapter of my life has ended, but another opens up. To new challenges, and new learning experiences!



Day #79 – 5 July 2012

Report Card Day today. And they put me in for the second shift for 1 Best! @.@

I thought it was a little strange, because normally, from when I was in school, only the form teacher would be meeting parents and talking about the students’ results and performance in class. This school, though, has a timetable where each class has 2 teachers go in to meet with the students’ parents. The form teacher goes in from 8.00 am-10.30 am and the second goes in from 10.30 am – 12.30 pm.

(Funny thing was, Hasrul, the other practical teacher, was given a class that he wasn’t even teaching. How is he supposed to talk to the parents of students he didn’t know? @.@ I just felt it was a little unfair towards the students and their parents, who had come to talk to the teachers on how their child is faring in the class. How can you give the parents what they want, and need, when you don’t even teach their child? Weird, no? @.@)

It’s strange, because I’m only a practical teacher, although I have been teaching them for four months now. But the discussion I have with the parents can only be a report of how he or she has been in class—English lesson, of course—and not really much about where do we go from here. Because, well, I won’t be teaching them anymore after tomorrow! :/

Anyway, I got really nervous too because parents would also be paying the PIBG fees as well, which meant that I would have to collect money and issue receipts on behalf of the form teacher. And I’m always nervous about handling money. I’ve never really had good experiences keeping money that doesn’t rightfully belong to me. I’m very careless, see? Losing my own money is one thing, but someone else’s? And a huge amount at that! @.@

Thankfully though, Ustazah Zainah didn’t leave me to deal with the parents alone. There were so many parents waiting that, instead, she opened another “counter” to meet with the parents so that the parents didn’t have to wait so long 🙂 So things went much faster from there 😀

One parent though, was very scary—Azim’s father. He was very tough on Azim and I felt very sorry for him. Even said some hurtful things that, if it were me, I would go home and cry about. >.< He is terrifying, his father! Then, after questioning his son’s performance, he turned to me and asked, “So, apa nak buat ni?” and I think he expected me to do something about his son’s poor performance! @.@

I didn’t know what to say! I mean, my last day is tomorrow, what can I say? @.@

Besides, Azim wasn’t all too bad. Bs and Cs. But he did very badly for his Pendidikan Islam, and that really got his dad upset, I suppose. (He actually asked him if he wanted to change religion, since he was doing badly at Agama Islam =.=)

Phew! Some parents can be really scary! @.@ I heard from Sun about worse, and I feel grateful that I wasn’t in her shoes, cos I wouldn’t know how to handle that! >.<

I was glad for the opportunity to meet some of my students’ parents. It’s quite fun to see how alike/unlike each other some of them are! xD Most of their mums and dads seemed like pretty decent people. Actually, most of my kids are pretty decent and okay; they just lack focus. Too playful. Or they haven’t really found the motivation for studying hard just yet. Hopefully when they’re older 🙂

I’ve finished all my work! Finished marking the piles of books under my table, and arranged all the PBS worksheets and whatnot to be passed on to Pn. Shahril (for 1 Best) and Pn. Kartini (1 Buck). There’s nothing left to do but get my attendance sheet signed by the Principal and have my last two-period lesson with my kids 😀

I’m planning to play a non-language game (Awww, come on! Just once! xD) then maybe think of another one, then a prize-giving session (for best Mid-Year results, best work, best participation etc.) and finally, end with a song—“Count on Me” by Bruno Mars. It’s gonna be fun! 😀


Day #78 – 4 July 2012

Dr. H came today.

I was so nervous because I didn’t know. Sun had her class first, and I was expecting a call from Dr. when she arrived so I can show her to Sun’s classroom. But no call came.

I got worried that she didn’t come and we’d have to make more arrangements so we can be observed on Friday—which I totally did not want because I wanted so badly to sad goodbye to my kids and have one lesson of fun and games as the final one before I say goodbye :/

I needn’t have worried. She came, alright.

Oh, dear. I had a very antsy half an hour between knowing she was here and I was definitely going to be observed today, and my lesson.

I was a bit unsure of today’s lesson because I didn’t really know what to expect. I was a little worried that I had overestimated the time a little bit and that I might not have any activities to do to fill the time. At the very least, that would count for poor time management. Yikes. :/

Anyway, for the induction, I asked Hamzah, very sternly, to “Close the door” and “Sit down” then told the rest, “Keep quiet!” That certainly got their attention for a while! xD But it was only so I could write those sentences down and explained that these were directives/commands/instructions—sentences that had an action word as the head of the sentence. I had initially planned for just a few minutes discussion to get examples from students, but extended it instead, because I thought then it would be clearer for them, what directives are.

Then we moved on to the PBS worksheet. There were incomplete instructions on how to make a paper plane, and I gave them recycled papers to make the paper planes with as visual aids. I taught them vocabulary like “fold” “crease” “bottom right corner” “top left corner” etc. Then we were supposed to work out the rest of the instructions together. For example, “What can you see in the picture? What can we write as instructions? What do you call this corner?” etc.

However, since it’s instructions to make a paper plane, which, almost everyone knows (duh!), some went ahead and made the paper plane. But that’s not what I wanted. What I wanted was for them to come up with simple instructions on how to make one. @.@ The reason I chose a paper plane was because it was simple enough for them to focus on just forming the sentences/directives and not on the how.

Anyway, that took less time than I expected and I was left with too much time on my hands! Had a minor panic attack, trying to figure out what to do next! >.< Thankfully, I had the next activity.

Honestly, it was by God’s grace that I had this activity in my lesson plan. See, last night, as I was going through my lesson plan in detail once more before my observation today, I was struck with this thought that I had overestimated the time. It wouldn’t take as much time as I had specified in the plan. So, as a last minute decision, I added another small activity into the plan, which meant that I had only printed the new amended lesson plan just this morning and pasted it over the one I had prepared before.


Because that activity was what saved me! Since the objective was so students would be able to write simple instructions, I thought to really assess that, they could also do it orally. So what I did was create a scenario where they would do a mini role-play. The situation is like this: A boy/girl desperately needs to know how to make a paper plane because his/her nephew is crying for one. He/she calls a friend to find out the instructions on how to make it.

In my plan, I had wanted only one pair of volunteers. But Hamzah and Harith were such a riot that I decided to call more pairs up to act, to fill in the time. Thankfully, I also had enough sweets to give all of them as reward! 😀 For the next two presentations, I had 3 people each, with one more even acting as the baby! xD The boys were naturally witty and funny, as always. The two girls, however, were too soft-spoken, and when the class couldn’t really hear them, they became bored and restless and noisy. Something I could not really handle very well. Hm, either I reduce the number of volunteers, or choose the boys for these kinds of presentations.

Anyway, that brought me back on track in terms of the time. 🙂

For the final activity, I made them listen to instructions to make a Double Hearts Bookmark. But I didn’t tell them what we were making, though. They had to listen carefully and follow the instructions carefully if they wanted to find out! xD

THAT, however, took longer than I expected. Many had trouble with some of the steps, because it was definitely not as simple as making a paper plane. I kept reminding students to help each other. Some were alright, but some just left their neighbour flailing, trying to figure out how to get the step right. Maybe I should have more help-your-partner kind of activities next time, to nurture a more caring attitude. Some of them are just so selfish! @.@

Anyway, because I didn’t have much time, I kind of rushed through the last few minutes for the closure! >.< Didn’t end as well as I’d hoped. But all in all, the lesson was a success! 😀

Got very good and constructive comments from Dr. H and I was really grateful for her. When she gives you her feedback and suggestions, you know that she only wants you to improve 🙂

At this point, I really want to thank God for everything. I never thought that getting an A would be possible. I doubted myself so much that I didn’t think I had what it took to achieve this, but now, look at me! I did it! 🙂 Everything was just right—the timing, the last-minute amendments, the split-second decisions… They all added up to this moment 🙂

We have been truly blessed, Sun and I. To get this school, to get the classes we have, to get Dr. Melor as our supervisor, to get Dr. H as our second observer. We are so very fortunate. So so soooo very fortunate. Thank you, God!

Dr. H wrote in my Record Book, as her last sentence, “I am proud to have taught and trained you.” Awwww. :’)

I’m (almost) FREE! 😉


btw, These are some of the cards that the students handed up to me from yesterday’s activity 🙂

Day #77 – 3 July 2012

I had an awful day today 😦

Today was a little nerve-wrecking because a second observer might be coming to see me teach. (Yes, I know I said I wasn’t going for the A, so I shouldn’t have a second observer, but………it’s a long story. So in short, I am now going for the A—not really much of a choice—and Dr. H is supposed to come and observe me and Sun in these two days.)

I didn’t have class on Tuesday and Wednesday according to the new timetable, so I had to take some of the periods from other teachers so I could enter 1 Buck to teach them. I tried very hard to adjust the time, but unfortunately, the most convenient time for today was their two PE periods—which I felt really bad about, knowing how much the boys really loved PE. 😦

I didn’t have time to explain to them last week, because our Thursday and Friday lessons were postponed, due to the Sports Day practices. The only way I could inform them was through our Facebook group, and not many actually check there often, I suppose.

So, I was going to enter their class after recess today. I went to the class just before they took off for recess to talk to them, and request that they come back to class on time, please. Just in case Dr. H comes.

They were all crowding around me after their teacher left, and I told them the news. Some of the boys, who obviously had not known that their beloved PE periods were going to be taken, immediately reacted: “Alaa, apa lah Cikgu ni!” “Cikgu ni, kenapa ambik masa PJ?!” and their faces showed, very clearly, how displeased they were about the arrangement.

I don’t exactly know why, but I got very angry. I was practically begging for their help. >.<

And besides, is that the way to talk to a teacher? I was already feeling very bad for taking their PE periods, but if I had any other choice, I would take it >.<

I quite angrily remarked that this would be my final week here and that after this, I will never kacau them again. That this would be the LAST favour they would ever have to do for me. Would that be fine with them?

I was really upset with what they had said, and how they had reacted. It’s not like I was doing this for fun. It’s not like I have nothing better to do than to steal all their periods and enter their class. It’s not like I want to enter their class that badly, anyway. >.<

I was so mad when I told Sun about it. But after a while, I felt bad for scolding them. It was their initial reaction to finding out their favourite time of the week was taken away. I guess I can get that. :/ But that still does not excuse the way they spoke to me. And I just didn’t like the way they made me feel, when I just had the very best of intentions, and even the decency to feel bad for taking their PE periods 😦

But you know what was worse?

How they were in class. They showed me, unabashedly, how unhappy they were about me taking their PE. They were uncooperative, noisy, disrespectful. Every few minutes, they were walking around the class and doing their own thing without bothering about me, standing in the front trying to conduct a decent lesson! I had to keep going, “Hamzah, can you please sit down?” “Amir, why are you walking around?” “Haris, SIT DOWN!”

It was frustrating! They would give me this, this……face, and then ignore me! It was tiring, and…….hurtful. I felt that I had no respect from them whatsoever. It was very painful to realize that.

Anyway, I tried to teach, but kept hearing students talking in the background. I had some nice activities planned for them, but it was so difficult to carry out! >.<

What I had planned for this lesson was, to be able to write short wishes/greetings in a get-well card. So, for the input part, I gave them the five parts of a simple get-well card that I analyzed from a sample and came up with myself:

1. Greetings: eg. Dear…….

2. Sympathies: eg. I am sorry to hear about/that…

3. Wish/Advice: eg. I hope you get better/recover soon! or You should be more careful next time/rest more and drink lots of water.

4. Parting comment: eg. Hope to see you in school soon! I’ll come visit you sometime!

5. Sign-off: eg. Sincerely, Lisa (signed)

So, after writing this on the board and giving them more examples, I told them to fill in their worksheets with the appropriate sentences, referring to the ones we had discussed on the board.

For the next activity, I thought it would be fun for them to draw lots to get a cartoon character to whom they would “write” a get-well card to—which they will present orally. They have to make sure they have the 5 parts of a get-well card. And they can make it as creative/funny as possible! For example, if they drew the lot for Popeye, they could say something like, “Dear Popeye, I am sorry to hear that you have come down with the flu. You should eat more of your favourite spinach! Hope to see you soon. Sincerely, Lisa.”

Each volunteer would receive a small reward—sweets! 😉

The boys were excited to volunteer and try out, which was good 🙂 And they seemed to be able to do well, though they kept referring to what I had written on the board. Maybe I should’ve erased it off. But I didn’t want them to be left completely on their own either :/ Anyway, things were going well. The boys were doing great, then I had girls to come up and present as well. They were shy, and their voices were too soft, but they knew what to say too 🙂

Still, there were many of them still walking around and doing their own thing, or talking and not really paying attention to what others were presenting that I had to keep shushing them and walking around to stop the noisy ones from talking. It’s so very hard to concentrate, have you ever felt that? >.<

It was then that Ezzul, the monitor, came up to the teacher’s table and just said, “Teacher, I want to go to the toilet. I want the pass.” I was annoyed because quite a number were walking around and not really focusing on the lesson, so I told him NO and to sit down first. Do you know what he replied to me?

Alaa, Cikgu. Pergi tandas pun salah ke?

And believe you, me. It wasn’t in a very nice way. It was in an irritated, angry tone, complete with angry frown and hand gestures.

I was furious. Is that the way you talk to a teacher?

Honestly, it was very hurtful. I scolded him, saying that it wasn’t the first time he had talked to me in such a disrespectful manner, and I was tired of it. I asked him if he talked that way to other teachers, he said no. So what was so SPECIAL about me that he has to talk to me that way? Treat me this way?

It’s not like I want to demand respect, but tell me I don’t deserve to be spoken to in a civil manner? Tell me I don’t deserve to be treated with some common courtesy?

And it’s true; they don’t treat other teachers like that, but they do to me? Why? WHY?

I felt the tears coming. I handed him the pass without another word. Tried to take deep breaths without making it too obvious that I was about to cry.

Thankfully, Rayymond had paused earlier when I was scolding Ezzul, but had resumed his presentation the moment Ezzul had left with the pass. So I had the opportunity to jump right back in. :/

Lesson resumed. After half an hour of that, I gave them coloured paper and asked them to create a get-well card for a friend, or even one of the cartoon characters that came up earlier during the presentation. They could cut, colour, design the card however they like, and write to whoever they like, whatever they like, as long as they made sure that the message had the five parts that we had learned earlier.

I was glad for this activity, because students were more quiet as they worked on their cards. And I also liked the fact that it gave some of the more artistic+creative students a chance to shine 🙂

Lesson-wise, I think I was able to give them enough input on how to write a get-well card. Even more than was provided in the PBS worksheet. From their presentations, they seemed to understand the five parts of a get-well card we had learned, which is great. However, I think I should have erased the notes on the board so they had no choice but to depend on themselves. My rationale for leaving the notes on the board was as a form of scaffolding. I guess it just occurred to me that I could have erased the examples, but left the main skeleton on the board! Silly me! =.= Anyway, they seemed to enjoy the presentation part, as well as the creating-cards section.

But I can’t shake off the feeling that my students don’t treat me with enough respect/politeness. Sometimes, I think that they genuinely don’t know they are being rude/disrespectful. Sometimes, it’s because they’ve been allowed to get away with it for too long. To be fair, not all of them are like that. Most of the girls are fine. It’s just, some of the boys…. >.<

I was quite hurt today by their behaviour. I didn’t know how badly until I felt tears welling up. Maybe I’m making a mountain out of a mole hill. Or maybe, it’s the cumulative effect of having been treated this way the entire time I’ve been here.

It’s already my last week. I thought things would get easier. But it seems that I still lack control over my class. And because of that, I feel that the lesson I conducted today was a failure not in terms of content, not in the delivery, but in the extraneous factors—class control. If I could control my class better, there would be less distractions and those who really want to learn, can truly learn and receive the full input.

I can’t help feeling like I am a failure as a teacher. It reminds me of my 2 Gem days, when some of the good boys had told me that they felt like they couldn’t really learn properly in class because of some of the problematic students who disrupt the class. I should be able to control these students, and I have to learn to control them, for the sake of the other students. Basically, I control the learning environment in the classroom. Seen that way, when I don’t, or can’t control these difficult students, I am failing the rest as a teacher.

Maybe I’m just not cut out to be a teacher. 😦

It’s a Saturday.

But I was in school by 6.30 am! @.@

I had to be there early to get the march past kids ready. Funny thing was, Cikgu Mazira asked all the students and teachers to be in school by that time, but she herself was late. About half an hour late =.=

Anyway, when Sun and I reached school, Mr. Ng was there, waiting in the pitch darkness. It was quite scary to be in school at this time. There’s nobody around, and everywhere is dark and creepy :/

Yes, I’m not really a fan of the dark >.<

There were problems because the lights and fan in the Prefects’ Room (where we were supposed to meet) couldn’t be turned on. Something to do with the main switch being off, and no one but Mr. Zaini knew how to turn it on. Not even the guard! :/ But the classroom next to it was the same! @.@

Thankfully one of the classes on the opposite side of the building could be turned on. Phew! So I got the kids (those who were punctual, which were few :/) to get dressed in their “pimped up” tracksuits and stick their R’s on their t-shirts.

At 7.20 am they were still farrrrrrr from done! They all rushed down to get their Robin Hood hats and masks. But there were so many problems that we encountered! Their ribbon and crepe paper were coming off a little, so I had to stick+staple them back on their tracksuits. The hats were too loose, so they had to staple rubber bands onto them but they snapped easily because the staples couldn’t really hold them in place. The masks, on the other hand, were too tight and were cutting into their poor faces! Plus, the holes were too small for their eyes to see through properly 😦

So, we teachers were running around fixing them up here and there, and I myself was turning around right, left, behind me when students called to me. “Teacher, it’s too tight!” “Teacher, my ribbons are coming off!” “Teacher, my rubber band snapped! What do I do?” Teacher, teacher, TEACHER!


Panic and stressed out at the beginning! Especially since we were the last contingent to go down to the field, so we didn’t have time to rehearse much. And the little that we did, it was an utter mess! @.@ Everybody had forgotten this and that, and were confused about this and that… You can imagine how worried I felt T.T

When they were up, so many things went wrong.

Because our introduction was long, their voices couldn’t be heard when they did the cheers and danced+sang. Ruzana’s hat fell off mid-way. Aswad’s feather fell off after the salute. Then they forgot everything—really, EVERYTHING! There was supposed to be a mini sketch in the middle where Robin Hood will defeat an alien, done by the Form 6 student mascots, who were dressed up in Robin Hood garb. There was even supposed to be a small party popper during it! But everything was forgotten! Our commander completely forgot everything. He even missed out our song! We were supposed to sing:

Mambo (mambo)

Kita kejar nombor satu (kita kejar nombor satu)

Jangan segan, jangan malu (jangan segan jangan malu)

Tingkat usaha, terus maju (tingkat usaha terus maju)

Siapa raja? (Rajawali!)

Siapa raja? (Rajawali!)

Rajawali….(Boleh! Boleh! BOLEH!)

Rajawali boleh~ Rajawali boleh~

Rajawali boleh-eh-eh-eh-eh-eh-AH!

It was supposed to be fun, but… They didn’t have a chance to do it! T.T

When the contingent left, I was wondering, what happened? Where was the sketch? Where was the singing?

It was such a heart-breaking sight to see our contingent walking away, their heads down, their arms swinging all over the place, out-of-sync. Poor Iskandar (the commander) seemed extremely down and disappointed too. I think he must be blaming himself for the mess.

Well, I was not mad at them. I felt more sad for them because they practised so hard, and to not even be able to present what they’d practised all this while? Such a waste! And I bet they must have been so disappointed. 😦 What can we do? We still did the best that we could. I think poor Iskandar must have let his nerves get the best of him. Everything completely forgotten! Sayang je~

I was also involved in the persiapan tempat, and since Pn. Zaimie was not there, and I was rather kelam-kabut with my march past kids, Sun had to settle the rest of the things alone. She managed to get a student to carry a large fan all the way from the surau only to find that it wasn’t working. And the extension wasn’t long enough! So she had to get another student to get another fan. Minor panic!

After the march past had marched out, I just made sure the kids all took their breakfast of nasi lemak and drink, and that they returned all their costume apparel to me. I had to collect them all and send them back to my place in the staff room. After that, I was pretty much free. I could watch the track events from the stands 🙂

Oh, but I was called down for the teachers’ event—the Sukaneka! I had to carry a ping pong ball using chopsticks! And silly me, I dropped the ball T.T I was so mad at myself. I think I ran too quickly and the ball fell from my chopstick-grasp. Thankfully, Mdm. Gouri was fast with the ball and the hoop, Kak Koh could hop away with balloons pinned between legs and arms, and Mr. Ng was fantastic walking on bricks! xD Kak Aishah won second place for us when she sprinted the last 50 m! AWESOME! 😀

Then, the track events continued. It was great to be able to sit down and watch and cheer for Rajawali! 🙂

Unfortunately, things took a bad turn when there was fight after one of the track events. It was the Under 18 Males 4×100 m event. We had one new student from a sports school representing Rajawali in this event. He’s good, as was proven in other events.

Our first 3 runners were good, really good. But I think the third runner helped give us a large enough lead for the final runner—this Zaidi, from the sports school. I saw, with my own eyes, in plain sight, him taunting the runner behind him, from Merak, and at the final bit, run into his lane.

It was a foul.

The Merak runner was furious. And so was Mr. Thina, who is in Merak as well. There was a dispute about the validity of the results, since Zaidi committed a foul. Then, I don’t really know what happened, but suddenly there were quite a number of boys down on the field, runners and spectators alike, who were getting physical. Some were pushing to get at Zaidi, and some were trying their best to hold the emotional ones back. There was one particular boy, from Kenyalang (Red House) who was trying to get at Zaidi, obviously furious with what he’d done (although I’m a little confused as to why he is mad when the offense was against the Blue House, Merak :/). Several boys had to hold both the Kenyalang boy and Zaidi back. They were quite a distance from each other, so I did not expect it when the Kenyalang boy broke free from his friends and ran straight towards Zaidi………..and threw a punch! @.@

OMG. Can you imagine that feeling of utter horror and helplessness as you watch a student streak across the field with anger in his steps, and you know that something bad is going to happen but you cannot do anything watching from the stands? :O

It was scary, and frightening, to say the least. >.< My heart was pounding, because I was so afraid something else might happen. Thankfully, they managed to settle it peacefully after that, and there were no more punches thrown.

But there was a VERY heated discussion between Cikgu Hanira (who is for Rajawali) and Mr. Thina (for Merak). It went on for quite a while and kinda disrupted the program a little @.@ (It was also a little embarrassing because all this happened in clear view of the representatives from PIBG, and parents! >.<)

Although I am from Rajawali, and it was very clear who reached the finish line first with such a distance between them, no contest, Zaidi was still in wrong for entering another runner’s lane. Intentional or not, it was a clear foul. In addition to that, I think he was too cocky and now he has to pay the price for it. He had that win in his grasp, but because of his over-confidence and cockiness, he practically gave it up. :/

Later on, it was announced that the entire 4×100 m event was disqualified. I was  surprised because, I thought Zaidi would be disqualified, but by right, the second person would be announced the winner, the third, second and so forth. But here, the entire event was disqualified! Why? @.@ It wasn’t fair to the others who had run and did nothing wrong! >.< Sun later told me that the reason they decided to just remove the event was because, if they had given winners for the event, there would still be a lot of dissatisfaction and displeasure, and the teachers were more afraid of the boys taking things into their own hands and settling the matter “outside of school”. (Doesn’t it sound like a decision made from experience? @.@) So, for their safety, and so NOBODY wins, they disqualified the event. >.<

We continued with the tarik tali event, and it was so upsetting when Rajawali lost that too, to Kenyalang. :/ Still, it was the finals, so we won second place 🙂

Overall, we were third out of the four Houses. And it was thanks to our wins in the track events. Otherwise, we would definitely have been last. First, of course, was Merak, who also won first for the march past competition and the Tent Decoration category. Second was Cenderawasih, and last, was Kenyalang.

We were able to finish everything, even with the Principal’s speech, by 1.00 pm. But the clearing up took some time, especially since Sun and I had to send a lot of things back to where we had taken them from the VIP Area. The potted plants, the carpets, the sofas, the table cloths, the partition from the staff room, the extension etc. @.@

However, I am very grateful for the wonderful weather we had! The past few days had seemed rainy, but it didn’t rain a single drop today. And what was more, it wasn’t all that hot either! Even in the middle of the day at 12.00 pm, it was cloudy enough that your skin didn’t burn under the sun! Such BEAUTIFUL weather indeed. I was amazed 🙂

It was certainly an exhausting day. But I am just thankful that it’s over and done with, although the fight was a little unnerving. Still, it was a success and everything went according to plan 🙂

p.s: I came back to my room and DIED for three hours! xD

Day #75 – 29 June 2012


Both my double periods with my two classes were gone—AGAIN! T.T

It was a hectic and exhausting day. Although it’s Friday, I had to stay back after school to complete the students’ costumes for the march past, and for march past practice too. :/

The assembly itself finished at about 9.15 am because they had the prize-giving ceremony for those sports events that had already been carried out. Then, I was called to help Pn. Zaimie because Sun and I were involved in Persiapan Tempat for the VIPs at the spectators’ stands.

We had to clean the place, get the sofa, carpet, tables, potted plants, decorate them. And thankfully, there were students around whom we could ask for help to carry the furniture for us. Otherwise, we wouldn’t have been able to do it ourselves! God bless these students who offer help every time they see us. (I realized that the Form 1 boys are just very stubborn, playful and unhelpful. You practically have to beg them for help to carry tables, chairs etc. =.= But the older boys are much more willing to help a teacher. So I appreciate these boys who came to our aid so quickly 😀 We should not take them for granted.)

When that was done, I had to stay and help the march past kids. Then there were things to take care of for the students’ costumes. We had to cut and stick ribbons and crepe paper on 30+ students’ tracksuits, and print and cut out and paste double-sided tape on the R’s (for Rajawali/Robin Hood—our theme! xD) And would you believe it, the entire day was already gone! @.@

When Cikgu Zana (thank GOD for her) and I were done with the costumes for the kids, we headed down to the field to help out with the march practice. They were still practising although it was close to 5.00 pm. They had to work really hard on the formation, because they weren’t entirely ready yet :/ But thankfully, Cikgu Mazira and Mr. Ng were with them to help while Cikgu Zana and I were working on the costumes.

They went on till past 5.00 pm, closing in to 6.00 pm! The poor kids! 😦 They must have been really really tired and exhausted and….touchy. They were even beginning to quarrel among themselves—which is a sign that they’ve had enough. We were all tired and thirsty and hungry, even. I really felt sorry for the kids. They have been practising almost all day. :/

At the moment, Rajawali is last in the latest House position. We’re so far behind that, I think even winning the Perbarisan competition, and maybe the Hiasan Khemah one too, might not be enough to make us overall winner. 😦

But that doesn’t mean we’re not gonna do our best tomorrow! 😀

Tomorrow is D-Day. I have a feeling that I’m gonna be DEAD after tomorrow (figuratively, of course) because, not only am I involved in the persiapan tempat VIP without our head (Pn. Zaimie won’t be around) and the march past teachers one person short (Cikgu Zana will not be coming either! T.T), they have also put my name down as one of the members for the Teachers’ Sukaneka event (they pushed me into it, and I couldn’t say no :/)

Like I said, I think I’m gonna be DEAD after the program tomorrow!

Plus, I have to be in school by 6.30 am!!!! (Cikgu Mazira’s orders T.T)

Exhausted, after coming back to my room at 6.15 pm today. 😦 I have to keep reminding myself, “It’s just for one more week. One more week. One more week.” @.@

Day #74 – 28 June 2012

We had the rehearsal for Sports Day today.

Which I didn’t know meant having to go down to the muddy field for the perbarisan and some of the track events—so I wore my baju kurung and covered flats. =.=

They were covered in bits of wet grass and mud! T.T

Anyway, we had the rehearsal right up till 10.00 am in the morning, then the kids had their recess till 10.30 am. According to the announcement earlier that morning during assembly, only the students involved in the events had to assemble at the spectator stands at the field for their events, and the rest were supposed to be in class. Which meant that there should be regular P&P going on, right?

I had two double periods with 1 Best and 1 Buck, so I was ready to go for class at 10.30 am.

Then a voice came over the speakers and instructed ALL students to go down to the field—no one is allowed in the classrooms.

WHAT??? @.@ *confused*

I guess there wouldn’t be any classes then :/

We had quite a number of events today, and I had forgotten how fun it is to watch it, and to cheer for your House. It feels like ages since the last time. What was worse, I was never a fan of sports (still am not =.=) but I guess I can better appreciate sports now, more than I did when I was in school. I never saw the point in Sports Day. But I guess now, I can see that it’s actually a lot of fun, and certainly instills good sportsmanship in students 😀

I truly admire those students who were running the long distance runs, like the 1500 m. My goodness, it is so tough! Really requires a lot of stamina. I would literally die running the 1500 m.

And it was really nice to see students cheering for even the ones who came in last, because they struggled to finish the race. I mean, isn’t that what it’s all about? Never giving up? I think those students should be very very proud of themselves for finishing the race. It’s a feat, in itself. Sometimes, in our competitiveness (as spectators) we tend to forget how tough it is to play out there. We get frustrated and angry when they lose. But if it were us in their shoes, would we be able to do the same, or any better? @.@

(Suddenly reminds me of the Euro 2012 that’s going on right now—don’t we scream curses at the players when they don’t do well? I mean, seriously, can we do better? >.< We should cheer them on for making it that far!)

Oh, and the tarik tali event was sooooo exciting to watch! Ten big guys on each team, fighting against a rope! Simple enough, but is soooo difficult! I saw the poor students, sweat pouring down their foreheads and backs, and their hands chaffed from the friction. Only later they “remembered” to let the students coat their hands with flour/powder.

Ahaha, I couldn’t help myself cheering for Rajawali! I think if I were a student, I would be cheering and screaming even louder! I even considered going right down to the grounds to watch the fight up-close, as most of the students were doing (and some teachers too, screaming themselves hoarse for their respective teams!) but…… my baju kurung? Was only a split-second thought before I knew it was a bad bad idea =.=

Anyway, today’s events ended with the tarik tali. And because of the events, I missed my 2 periods with 1 Best completely. And then I only had like, 20 minutes with 1 Buck left. But since I had march past practice with the kids, I didn’t enter my class :/ Yikes.

But the march past group really needs the practice. They’re not that uniform yet, and they hadn’t even thought out the formation! Oh, dear. I don’t know if we’re gonna have enough time! And their costumes aren’t done yet either! @.@

Tomorrow, they’re asking if they can start practising in the morning for the entire day. I’m not exactly thrilled with the idea, though :/want to enter my classes—another two double periods with my two classes. But at the same time, I feel that our Rajawali marchers really need help :/

Besides, so many students are involved in one thing or another that I wonder how many students will be left in the class without any involvement in Sports Day. We’ll see how things go tomorrow. I have a feeling that classes are gonna be disrupted anyway. Even if I enter class, how am I gonna teach when so many aren’t in? I’ll have to repeat the lesson then! =.=

Dilemma. :/

Day #73 – 27 June 2012

A very tiring day, today. :/

Had sports in the morning again. I’m not really a fan of this alternative schedule—leaves you exhausted by the middle of the day!

I was a little annoyed this morning because everything was so disorganized. I was involved in the march past for Rajawali, but the kids were stuck at the assembly grounds for almost an hour because the teachers had not settled a lot of things. They didn’t know what events were on for today, who were the students selected for each event, they hadn’t prepared the running numbers etc.

I thought all this was supposed to have been settled last week? :/ So we wasted a precious hour just waiting! The march past kids could’ve started earlier. Sighhhh.

Anyway, I believe they improved more this time round. But some were still too playful and not taking the training seriously. But I also believe the commander plays a huge role in providing the right “spirit” or semangat to march, you know?

The teachers were busy figuring out what the students are gonna wear, their costumes, their cheers etc. Thankfully, Cikgu Mazira got the Form Six students to help with all that. They’ve got some interesting ideas for our mascot and theme, but I don’t wanna spoil the surprise just yet! Will reveal all come Saturday! 😉

And I’m also thankful for Cikgu Zanariah. She’s been with me, watching over the march past kids. We were the only two who stayed back with them yesterday 😦 But we couldn’t really help much. Just kinda helped to keep an eye on them and let them know when they’re marching on the wrong foot or something 😛

Today, I had 3 relief classes too. 1 Perd, 4 Gem (yikes!) and 5 Sau.

I thought I could do the same activity with the classes. Unfortunately, that didn’t really work out. I had the first period after their half hour recess after sports in 1 Perd. When I went in, almost half the class hadn’t come in yet. I made them clean the class a little, and before you know it, it’s only 20 minutes till my relief ends. So I just waited in with them, made sure they were all in class and not wandering around. I was quite worried to see 2 Gem on the opposite building all walking around. There was barely anyone in the class! @.@ I wonder where they all went, and who their teacher was. :/

I got 4 Gem, thankfully, during a program. There was a talk, organized by Gatorade, I think, on Dehydration. Which I feel is rather apt, since they’re all so busy training for Sports Day and sweating buckets. Rehydrating the body is important. But they were of course promoting their isotonic drink, Gatorade. I concur that rehydration is important, especially after sports. But I always believe that the best liquid for that purpose is plain water. Not some isotonic drink, non-carbonated or not. Water is the best, and the healthiest. Some of the students really don’t drink enough—they don’t even have their own water bottles! @.@

Anyway, for 4 Gem, I only had to bring them to the hall for the program. And that’s when the funniest thing happened! xD

I went to 4 Gem to make sure all the students were in, then escort them to the hall for the one-and-a-half-hour program. If you remember, 4 Gem is an all-boys class. Somehow, they joined up with the boys from 4 Best and, with me in the middle, it looked rather like a little girl (me lar) surrounded by a bunch of big boys. =.=

I don’t know who first suggested it, but someone said, “Wah, Cikgu, kita macam jadi bodyguard Cikgu lar!” and I was like, “What bodyguards? If a robber came, you’d be the first to run, wouldn’t you?” 😛 Then, I suppose it became fun to pretend that I was the VIP and they were my bodyguards—all 20+ big boys!

They walked in front of me, beside me and behind me—I was literally surrounded by them! Then they started calling out, “Bagi laluan! Bagi laluan! VIP nak lalu ni!” Other students actually turned and stared, and they would see a tiny me surrounded by the biggest, baddest Form 4 boys!

It was embarrassing…..but ridiculously funny at the same time! xD

And would you believe it? They actually carried on like that the ENTIRE way from their classroom to the Inspirasi Hall. OMG, I think quite a number of students actually saw them paving the way for me to go to the hall! =.=

I couldn’t help laughing, seriously. It was kinda funny. I know I should’ve told them to cut it out. But it was just harmless fun. And it was amusing 😛 Although, it was rather embarrassing too :/

Still, it was the FUNNIEST moment, ever! xD

Until they reached the hall and very quietly went out the side doors! I had to call them all back =.= Kantoi!

5 Sau was uneventful. There were only 6 students in the class because the rest were all out helping their House teachers with the Tent decorations and preparations for this Saturday. So I just sat in and marked some of my students’ books. Pretty boring half an hour before I let them off.

Thennnnn, we were supposed to have march practice after school ended at 4.00pm until 5.00pm. But I was not informed that the students had started practice at 2.50pm! @.@ Apparently, there was an announcement but I didn’t hear it :/ Anyway, when I was done with relief, I went round searching for our green-clad members, but couldn’t find them! >.<

Later, I found one of the girls, who told me that they had had a one-hour practice already, and had all gone home =.=

Wow, thanks for informing me, kids! >.<

Sometimes, I think students think they run the show too much. When teachers put them in charge, they feel that they answer to no one else. Which is wrong! Would it be too much to ask that they at least inform the teacher about what they plan to do? No one came and told me anything! And I looked silly walking around school asking random students if they’ve seen the Rajawali march past kids =.=

In addition, they aren’t supposed to be having practice during P&P time, especially without a teacher. >.<

Is it me, or have times really changed? =.=

Day #72 – 26 June 2012

Today is my first Tuesday of the new timetable and I am completely and utterly……………………..


Yup, I don’t have any classes today. Don’t ask me why; they arranged it that way. And you know what’s even better?

I don’t have classes on Wednesdays either.

Yes, which means I only teach 3 days a week! But that also means that 2 of my days are kinda packed :/ 2 double periods back-to-back! @.@ Tiring!

Anyway, no classes for the entire day also means that there’s bound to be more relief classes handed to you =.=

I was given 5 Gem, 1 Perd and 1 Best today.

5 Gem was alright. But it was an awkward period where they are just after PE, so some are missing cos they’re still on their way back, some are changing in the bathrooms etc. What can I do but just wait for them to all come back to class? And since they just trickled in, I didn’t make them get up to wish me. And I didn’t really do anything with them.

I was actually planning on playing a game with them. But since some of them were busy playing checkers and others…..looked busy, I just sat in the class and chatted with some of the boys. (Okay, I know I’m not supposed to do that, but they didn’t seem like in the mood for a game either =.=)

Then the boys somehow got to asking me about Chinese. Like how to say, “My name is…….” in Chinese! I am still rather surprised by their interest (and curiosity) towards everything Chinese. I think it’s because, to them, everything and anything Chinese is remotely foreign to them, and strange, and new! So they are very interested to learn things. They asked me how to say, “What are you doing?” and “Have you eaten?” in Mandarin, which I taught them. I just thought that, their interest to learn, albeit a language that I’m not exactly teaching nor very fluent in, should be encouraged. So I taught them a few phrases, which they enjoyed making fun of each other about. 😛

1 Perdana was kinda noisy, so I decided to play the game with them. Simple Word Formation: give them a long word, like Characterisation then ask them to form as many words as possible from the letters in the word under 3 conditions: 1) the word must be at least 2 letters, 2) no plurals eg. cat/cats, and 3) no names. The group with the most number of words, wins!

Surprisingly, they were quite cooperative, and most of them participated well. Only 2 refused to play, saying that they wanted to do their own work instead. FINE. :/

Anyway, they were all quite good! At the end, I wished I could give ALL of them sweets as prize, but I didn’t have enough 😦 Still, I wanted to encourage even those who did not win (they were getting a little competitive! @.@) by writing down the words that I had identified were good and that some groups had that all the others didn’t. So even though they didn’t win, each group had a couple of words that other groups did not find, which is a GOOD JOB! 😀

Still, I felt bad for not being able to give the rest something. Because the first two groups with the highest number of words were all the girls. Kinda pitied the boys who worked really hard too 😦 I mean, it must be frustrating to try their hardest and always lose out :/ If it were me, I might even give up on playing anymore games. And these boys were so enthusiastic! Sigh. Kesian pulak. :/

Oh, but I got really mad at one of the boys, Luqman. First of all, he didn’t want to cooperate. Absolutely refused to play. Then after that, was such a busybody to crowd around the table as I was calculating the results. Then he and some of the girls must have been quarreling about something or other, and I heard him say, “Fuck betul!

I was seriously shocked! So I called him, “LUQMAN, WHAT DID YOU SAY?”

And would you believe it? He completely ignored me. I am totally serious. He didn’t answer me at all and just…..walked away. I called him several times, yet he just plain ignored me. I was so mad, yet at the same time I didn’t want to get mad, especially with all the other students crowding around me >.<

When a friend called to him and said that Teacher (me) was calling him, he just answered, “Apasal?

He answered his friend, but he can’t answer me? >.<

I wish I could have just gone up to him and smacked him. ISH. So rude and disrespectful, and aside from that, uses offensive language. Ugh. Baru Form 1! @.@

Didn’t do much in 1 Best today cos there were just the boys. I took the time to do a PBS evaluation for one of the boys who was absent for the past two days. (Apparently, he went back to his hometown for a family emergency @.@)

Also, we had kawad practice today. Up till 5 something in the evening! Boy, am I tired! Granted, I wasn’t in charge of the training, but it was tiring nonetheless. :/ There are so many things more to settle for Rajawali House—costumes, formation, mascot etc. I wonder if we have enough time. Sports Day is this Saturday already! @.@

Anyway, I am exhausted. But will try to mark some books today 🙂 Somehow, my whole body is aching >.<

Sports practice tomorrow in the morning again, as we did last week. The students (and the teachers!) are gonna be tired out and restless/listless! Thank goodness I’m not teaching tomorrow! 😛

Day #71 – 25 June 2012

I had a simple lesson planned for 1 Best today—to write and make a simple get-well card! 😀

It’s part of their PBS evaluations, being able to write wishes or greetings. So the situation given is that a friend met with an accident and has a broken leg. They’re supposed to complete the get-well card in the worksheet. It just says:

Dear ___________,

I’m sorry to hear about your accident. I hope _____________________. Sincerely, __________.

So simple!

So I decided to discuss with them and come up with more sentences that they can write. For example, “I hope you get better soon/I hope you feel better soon/I hope your leg heals quickly/I hope you recover quickly.” Would you believe that one of the students, Sheikh, actually came up with the word “recover”? 😀 Really good!

Then another, Aina, asked if she could say something like, “Don’t do dangerous things on the road” (since the friend met with an accident). I thought it was a very good idea to add in possibly, some advice. Maybe, “Next time, you should be more careful/You should not be so careless next time.” Which is great! 🙂

Then finally, they should end with something like, “I hope to see you in school soon!” I saw some writing, “I miss you!” as if it were a real classmate! xD

After they were done filling in the blanks, I decided to add something into the lesson. I thought it would be nice for them to make actual get-well cards. I bought coloured paper, got them cut into halves and gave each student one piece. Then they would copy the message that we had discussed earlier, into the card and decorate/design it however they like.

Wow, they seemed to really get into it! 😀

As I walked around the class, there were some very interesting designs, and some who were very creative! Some, you could see, were really trying very hard and putting in a lot of effort into making the card—even Nash! 😛 I was pleasantly surprised. Maybe I need to do more of these hands-on activities with them. They don’t seem to like writing/reading tasks. Maybe more of these arts+crafts thing.

Too bad it’s only during the last 2 weeks that I notice, and have more time to do these kinds of things :/

Anyway, initially, I had planned making the actual get-well cards as a just-for-fun kind of thing. But seeing some of their really creative and awesome cards, I thought it would be good for them to hand their self-designed cards in to put into their PBS files. Wouldn’t that be great to show as evidence of their work? 😀

Of course, they don’t have PBS files yet, and so I’ve been keeping all the worksheets they’ve done so far on my desk. (I have only half of my table space left to do work on =.=) But I guess I can keep their cards and inform Pn. Shahril before I leave so they can put all their lovely masterpieces into their files 🙂

Here are some of the masterpieces! 😀