Tag Archive: 1 Best


Day #80 – 6 July 2012

My last day.

Last day! 😀

Mixed feelings? Not really. I was excited for class, to have the last lesson with the kids, because I had planned something fun for them, and prepared gifts and “awards” too! xD

But, no doubt about it, I was glad for it to be ending.

In the morning, the Muslim students had bacaan yasin so I thought I would take the chance to put some stuff in the Arts Room (stuff from Sports Day that has been sitting on and lying underneath my table for a week now =.=). Pn. Koh had actually informed me to come down for the assembly after the bacaan yasin but I didn’t expect to be stuck at the Arts Room with a student, looking for my file and pair of scissors that had gone missing since it was used for the March Past costumes and practices T.T

Anyway, I was late for the assembly! Everyone was waiting. Oops. :/

Worse, Sun could not be found nor contacted! I had no idea where she went, since I was at the Arts Room earlier, and she must not have brought her phone with her, cos I called and called but there was no answer :/ Hasrul had gone up to say a few words I think, but I didn’t get to hear him speak. I only arrived after that. Then, they presented me with so many gifts! The Teachers’ Club, the Choir Club, the English Language Panel etc.

I suddenly felt the urge to say something. I always get this strange anxious feeling when I feel there is something that I need to say/do. My heart starts beating really fast and I get a little breathless. They were almost ending the assembly already. Should I say something?

I asked Pn. Koh if it was possible for me to address the students and teachers. Just a few words. It was! :O So they gave me the floor. I thanked all the teachers for their guidance, and making me feel like a part of the SMK PP 14(1) family. Then I thanked all the students; although, this profession is very very challenging, I have had some sweet moments with all of them, moments that I will cherish and bring back with me. So, with the Principal’s permission, I would like to dedicate a song to all the teachers and students of SMK PP 14(1).

And I sang.

In front of everybody! :O

Just the chorus though, from Shila’s Memori Tercipta. I felt the lyrics were very apt:

Di sini jua

Memori tercipta

Walau seketika

Terjalin kasih kita

Mungkin di sini

Kita kan terpisah

Kenangan bersama

Tiada kulupa

🙂

When I had finished, the teachers told me they tak puas lagi dengar. (Later on, during the potluck the Teachers’ Club organized for us practical teachers, they requested me to sing again—the full song this time! @.@)

After the assembly, I was swarmed by students who had come to wish me well and say goodbye. Goodness, there were students already crying very badly, with teary eyes and runny noses. When I see that, I always feel like crying too. 😦 It made me sad, but it felt good to hug all of them, tell them not to cry, and to wish them the best in their studies.

I had some time before my classes, so I took the time to go round handing out the gifts that Sun and I bought for our guru pembimbing and Pn. Koh and a few other English teachers. Very small and simple gifts, as a token of appreciation for everything they’ve done for us 🙂 I felt quite sad and extremely grateful to Pn. Koh, but the usually stoic Sun actually cried! :O Understandable though, because Pn. Koh is one of the nicest, sweetest, most thoughtful person I have ever met. She “took care” of us more than our own guru pembimbing did, frankly :/ I will truly miss her 😦

I settled all the last minute matters, like handing over all my books and PBS sheets to Pn. Kartini and Pn. Shahril. I gave them my “work”sheet of when I recorded every time the students handed in their work to me. I had two columns for each book—for when they are on time, or late in handing in. And black/red-coloured pens for when their work was complete or incomplete. And shaded red boxes for when their work is unacceptably bad/shoddy. And also the complete list of everything that I had done with them in the past 16 weeks. Hope that that helps them to continue from there. 🙂

Also took the time to say goodbye and thank you to all the teachers, and to ask for forgiveness for anything that we might have said/done to hurt them. 😦 The rest, we said our goodbyes after the potluck lunch.

 

Class with 1 Buck and 1 Best were similar. The program was: 1) Chicken Goggles, 2) Awards Ceremony, 3) Last Words and finally, 4) Song: Count on Me. Both classes were laughing hysterically during the Chicken Goggles game! Uncomfortably loud, however. I was glad they were really enjoying themselves. But at the same time, I cringed every time Hamzah or Aswad screamed with laughter! @.@ I was so afraid of disturbing the other classes >.<

But they really seemed to enjoy the game. The reason why I never played it in class before was because it wasn’t really a language game. It was just an ice-breaking/for-fun kinda game. And it takes up time. More than half an hour to reach the Top 5 =.= I’m glad that they loved it so much though. Maybe they can play that together on their own next time 🙂

Then, I presented the awards. I gave 5 different awards: 1) Best Results (for the person with the highest marks for English for the Mid-Year exam), 2) Most Diligent (for the person who consistently handed in and did his/her work), 3) Most Participative (for the person who is most active and always volunteers in class), 4) Most Creative (for the most artistic person) and 5) Most Courteous (the student who is most polite and often offers to help me carry my things) 😀

For 1 Buck, the winners of the Awards were:

1) Ilham

2) Maisarah

3) Hamzah

4) Iffat

5) Azrina

And for 1 Best, the winners were:

1) Hannah

2) Nabihah

3) Aswad

4) Nisa

5) Hilman

🙂

I enjoyed giving them gifts of “certificates” and choki-choki chocolates and jellies 😛

Then, we had the Last Words. Speaking to them, I actually felt emotional, and for BOTH classes, there was a moment when I almost couldn’t speak because I was about to cry. But “thanks” to the boys who kinda made fun of me and some of the girls crying, I did not really cry. Couldn’t, really. When the boys made it into a funny matter =.= (Everything’s always funny with them >.<)

Then we sang the song together, took some photos. And that was it. My last two classes for my practicum! 😀

Now that it has ended, I can look back and see that I have learned a lot from this experience. It has been challenging, to say the least. Every single day was a challenge. It was exhausting, and frustrating. But we can only learn new things when things don’t go smoothly, isn’t that right? 🙂 I have learned from my kids, how to handle them, how to control them, how to draw them in. And I have tried my very very best to give them everything I had. I know I still have a lot to improve on, but it warms my heart when my kids tell me, “Teacher, you’re the best teacher I have ever had!” :’)

And they gave me such lovely gifts too! Here are some pictures:

 

Isn’t it all worth it in the end? One day, I hope to see them, successful and happy. I would be proud to say that they were my students, once. I sincerely wish them the best, and success.

We’ll keep in touch. On Facebook! 😉

One chapter of my life has ended, but another opens up. To new challenges, and new learning experiences!

 

Day #79 – 5 July 2012

Report Card Day today. And they put me in for the second shift for 1 Best! @.@

I thought it was a little strange, because normally, from when I was in school, only the form teacher would be meeting parents and talking about the students’ results and performance in class. This school, though, has a timetable where each class has 2 teachers go in to meet with the students’ parents. The form teacher goes in from 8.00 am-10.30 am and the second goes in from 10.30 am – 12.30 pm.

(Funny thing was, Hasrul, the other practical teacher, was given a class that he wasn’t even teaching. How is he supposed to talk to the parents of students he didn’t know? @.@ I just felt it was a little unfair towards the students and their parents, who had come to talk to the teachers on how their child is faring in the class. How can you give the parents what they want, and need, when you don’t even teach their child? Weird, no? @.@)

It’s strange, because I’m only a practical teacher, although I have been teaching them for four months now. But the discussion I have with the parents can only be a report of how he or she has been in class—English lesson, of course—and not really much about where do we go from here. Because, well, I won’t be teaching them anymore after tomorrow! :/

Anyway, I got really nervous too because parents would also be paying the PIBG fees as well, which meant that I would have to collect money and issue receipts on behalf of the form teacher. And I’m always nervous about handling money. I’ve never really had good experiences keeping money that doesn’t rightfully belong to me. I’m very careless, see? Losing my own money is one thing, but someone else’s? And a huge amount at that! @.@

Thankfully though, Ustazah Zainah didn’t leave me to deal with the parents alone. There were so many parents waiting that, instead, she opened another “counter” to meet with the parents so that the parents didn’t have to wait so long 🙂 So things went much faster from there 😀

One parent though, was very scary—Azim’s father. He was very tough on Azim and I felt very sorry for him. Even said some hurtful things that, if it were me, I would go home and cry about. >.< He is terrifying, his father! Then, after questioning his son’s performance, he turned to me and asked, “So, apa nak buat ni?” and I think he expected me to do something about his son’s poor performance! @.@

I didn’t know what to say! I mean, my last day is tomorrow, what can I say? @.@

Besides, Azim wasn’t all too bad. Bs and Cs. But he did very badly for his Pendidikan Islam, and that really got his dad upset, I suppose. (He actually asked him if he wanted to change religion, since he was doing badly at Agama Islam =.=)

Phew! Some parents can be really scary! @.@ I heard from Sun about worse, and I feel grateful that I wasn’t in her shoes, cos I wouldn’t know how to handle that! >.<

I was glad for the opportunity to meet some of my students’ parents. It’s quite fun to see how alike/unlike each other some of them are! xD Most of their mums and dads seemed like pretty decent people. Actually, most of my kids are pretty decent and okay; they just lack focus. Too playful. Or they haven’t really found the motivation for studying hard just yet. Hopefully when they’re older 🙂

I’ve finished all my work! Finished marking the piles of books under my table, and arranged all the PBS worksheets and whatnot to be passed on to Pn. Shahril (for 1 Best) and Pn. Kartini (1 Buck). There’s nothing left to do but get my attendance sheet signed by the Principal and have my last two-period lesson with my kids 😀

I’m planning to play a non-language game (Awww, come on! Just once! xD) then maybe think of another one, then a prize-giving session (for best Mid-Year results, best work, best participation etc.) and finally, end with a song—“Count on Me” by Bruno Mars. It’s gonna be fun! 😀

ONE MORE DAY!!!!!!

Day #71 – 25 June 2012

I had a simple lesson planned for 1 Best today—to write and make a simple get-well card! 😀

It’s part of their PBS evaluations, being able to write wishes or greetings. So the situation given is that a friend met with an accident and has a broken leg. They’re supposed to complete the get-well card in the worksheet. It just says:

Dear ___________,

I’m sorry to hear about your accident. I hope _____________________. Sincerely, __________.

So simple!

So I decided to discuss with them and come up with more sentences that they can write. For example, “I hope you get better soon/I hope you feel better soon/I hope your leg heals quickly/I hope you recover quickly.” Would you believe that one of the students, Sheikh, actually came up with the word “recover”? 😀 Really good!

Then another, Aina, asked if she could say something like, “Don’t do dangerous things on the road” (since the friend met with an accident). I thought it was a very good idea to add in possibly, some advice. Maybe, “Next time, you should be more careful/You should not be so careless next time.” Which is great! 🙂

Then finally, they should end with something like, “I hope to see you in school soon!” I saw some writing, “I miss you!” as if it were a real classmate! xD

After they were done filling in the blanks, I decided to add something into the lesson. I thought it would be nice for them to make actual get-well cards. I bought coloured paper, got them cut into halves and gave each student one piece. Then they would copy the message that we had discussed earlier, into the card and decorate/design it however they like.

Wow, they seemed to really get into it! 😀

As I walked around the class, there were some very interesting designs, and some who were very creative! Some, you could see, were really trying very hard and putting in a lot of effort into making the card—even Nash! 😛 I was pleasantly surprised. Maybe I need to do more of these hands-on activities with them. They don’t seem to like writing/reading tasks. Maybe more of these arts+crafts thing.

Too bad it’s only during the last 2 weeks that I notice, and have more time to do these kinds of things :/

Anyway, initially, I had planned making the actual get-well cards as a just-for-fun kind of thing. But seeing some of their really creative and awesome cards, I thought it would be good for them to hand their self-designed cards in to put into their PBS files. Wouldn’t that be great to show as evidence of their work? 😀

Of course, they don’t have PBS files yet, and so I’ve been keeping all the worksheets they’ve done so far on my desk. (I have only half of my table space left to do work on =.=) But I guess I can keep their cards and inform Pn. Shahril before I leave so they can put all their lovely masterpieces into their files 🙂

Here are some of the masterpieces! 😀

Day #70 – 22 June 2012

I was expecting a boring class with 1 Best today. And frankly, I have to admit that I am quite biased against 1 Best already. After four days of shouting at them and getting upset, I really didn’t feel like entering their class again today.

Still, I thought I would just keep it simple and finish up the third PBS evaluation for Band 1. A few pairs had already come forward to present their dialogues, and they were quite good. So, 10+ pairs to go. Should be alright now, wouldn’t it?

Managed to finish up the rest of the pairs. Some did very well, with very good intonation. Some had their strengths in their clarity. I always feel that if you speak just a liiiiiittle slower, not rushed, you are always clearer with your words. You don’t swallow your words as much. Which is good 🙂

For those I was not very satisfied with, I made them try again and also gave them some advice on how to do better. Hopefully, they’ll remember these things and apply them in real life. (But somehow, I doubt it. Maybe I am just too skeptical about the effectiveness of this entire PBS thing >.<)

Only Fathi and Nash were a little too playful. They kept giggling and laughing at the front that I was beginning to get annoyed. Why is everything a joke to them? :/Anyway, I made them do it over and over until they got it right. And honestly, they weren’t too bad, really. They just need to set their mind to it and focus, and take it seriously. Sigh. These kids. =.=

Anyway, I didn’t really expect to finish all the pairs with almost 45 minutes to spare! @.@

Thankfully, I had initially planned to teach them a song today. So I had the lyrics all photocopied and ready for them, and I already had the song file in my computer.

So I excused myself to get my laptop and borrow Sun’s speakers, just for a few minutes. I practically ran because I was afraid to leave my class unattended, even if it was a few minutes. But I made sure to give a stern warning that whoever leaves the class in my absence would be sent to Mr. Zaidi, the PK HEM.

Made it back to the classroom with no mishaps occurring while I was away. Phew! 😛

I chose Missing Piece by David Choi because it was a song that had a very simple melody and even simple lyrics, which would make it easy for the students to understand 🙂 Besides, this song was one of the songs in the soundtrack for the video My Generasi that I showed the class some time back. So it would be something they have heard a little bit of 🙂

I did a listen-and-fill-in-the-blanks exercise with them. I gave them lyrics with missing words and asked them to listen to the song carefully so they could fill them in as they hear the words.

Surprisingly, they seemed to enjoy the activity! They asked me to repeat the song so they could have another chance at filling in whatever words they couldn’t catch. In the end, I played the song 3 times for them 🙂

They were quite good, some of them. Managed to catch all but maybe one or two words 😛 And even before then, I had already noticed a few of them singing along to the music. These kids can catch melodies really fast! 😀 Even Nash, surprisingly, was good 😛 I even heard Fadhli, one of the weakest in the class, singing a line or two. I teased him, saying he could really sing, and he got so shy it was so adorable! xD

Then we discussed the lyrics, I explained some vocabulary and the meaning of the song as well 🙂 Then we sang the song together for a few more times! 😀

They really enjoyed the song, and I enjoyed singing with them 😀

I am really grateful for today. After almost a week of scolding them, I feel like I’ve found a good place with them once again. I don’t want to hope too much, but I really do hope that this will continue for my final two weeks with them. I want to leave happy, and satisfied. And I hope that they would be sad to see me go. Cos wouldn’t that mean that I’ve impacted their young lives in some way or other? 🙂

Thank you, God, for a good day today. May the next couple of weeks be filled with good days like this one!

 

 

p.s: I woke up with a swollen eye today (I think some stupid insect bit me! >.<) so I wore shades to class because I didn’t want the students to see me with my swollen left eye and no eyeliner =.= haha~ Of course, I got laughed at by 1 Buck, and teased in 1 Best. But they said I looked kinda cool, so that’s cool 😉

Day #69 – 21 June 2012

Finished up the 10 who were not able to complete theirs yesterday. Was slightly better today.

However, I was not very happy with the delay because, since there was sports again in the morning, my 2 period lesson was reduced to a one-hour one. So I have even less time for today’s lesson proper, even more so with the continuation of yesterday’s lesson at the beginning of today’s lesson. So, in the end, I had only about less than half an hour for today’s lesson.

After explaining what they were supposed to do for this PBS evaluation, I actually went through the dialogue with them and demonstrated how to pronounce certain words clearly, and the right intonation to go with them. I made them repeat after me, as well.

But, as usual, there were some paying attention, some not :/

I got angry with them again, because they were restless and giving problems every few minutes. You scold one, another one does something else. You scold that one, and another one does another thing! >.< It’s maddening and exhausting! T.T

They can just walk from one end of the class to the other while you’re right in front straining your voice to explain things to them. When you question them, they just answer, simply, “Dia panggil saya.”

SO????!!!!

Your friend calls you and you’re supposed to do what he says? What about what say? No walking around during the lesson! Why don’t YOU listen to THAT?

And just after I got that boy to sit down, another just gets up and does the exact same thing.

OMG, what is happening?! I am so tired of scolding. Or am I just supposed to close one eye and allow all these things to go on in my classroom? What? Seriously, what am I supposed to do? >.<

It is so difficult to control this class. In the midst of my explanation on the PBS evaluation, I can hear so much of talking and whispering and giggles that it’s realllyyyyy hard to concentrate. So I started scolding, and would you believe it? I could still hear talking in the background. So I really SHOUTED this time, just so I can hear the silence—to know that it’s actually possible to be this quiet, but that the students are just plain disobedient.

Sigh.

And Aswad. Gosh, Aswad. I don’t know what to do with him anymore. He’s a smart mouth, a chatterbox, a clown, and he ENJOYS the attention he gets. The class LOVES him. They think he’s freakin’ hilarious.

Well, let me break it to you, Aswad. You’re one of the rudest, most disrespectful, annoying, smart aleck rascals I have ever met. Yes, I admit that you are funny sometimes, but that does not mean you can get away with doing anything just to earn the laughs and approval of your classmates. You make me soooooo mad I wish I could just give you one big WHACK! on the head and make you see what a fool you’re being in my classroom.

I realize that he’s cooperative only when he wants to be. Then, the rest of the time he just says and does whatever he wants. He’s always ready with a comment after anything and everything that you say, just to make the class laugh. It’s not that I don’t allow laughter in my classroom (hello, sometimes make jokes for them to laugh at) but when I’m serious, please be serious. Especially since I’ve already given prior warning and instructions. FOLLOW THEM. Don’t just do whatever you want because you think it’s funny.

For example, for today’s PBS, I have to evaluate them on their ability to “read texts aloud with the proper pronunciation and intonation”. They were given a dialogue and asked to work in pairs. Now, I had already instructed the class that they are allowed to change the names of the students in the dialogue—Osman and Wong—to their own, but for everything else, they need to retain them because, as it says on the worksheet, I have to evaluate their ability to read the text aloud. I don’t really want spontaneous dialogues or their own original lines, because then, I will not be able to evaluate their ability to read texts aloud. When they create their own, they’ll be making grammar errors etc. which I do not want. So I told the class: change the names, but not anything else.

Of course, our dear Aswad thought it would be funny to just add things in. He read out, “I’m from Bandar Baru Bangi, Selangor” when there was clearly no “Selangor” in the text.

I understand it was a small addition. But I really disliked the fact that he was not taking the entire presentation seriously and that he just had to defy me and not follow instructions when I specifically said not to change any part of the text besides the names.

I made him re-do his part and said that I was not going to pass him until he took this seriously.

ARGH. I am really so angry with this boy! >.<

I am upset with the entire class, actually.  Every single lesson, even though I come in, take a deep breathe, and start anew, they manage to make me angry EVERY single lesson. Four days this week already, including today. >.<

I don’t feel like entering this class anymore.

I wish I could do that. 😦

Day #68 – 20 June 2012

The school started an alternative timetable today for Wednesdays. Apparently, students have been skipping co-curriculum on Wednesdays, and last week’s attendance was so bad that the administration decided that something had to be done.

Their solution?

To shift co-curriculum and sports up to the morning and have the regular T&L session from 10.30 am right up till 3.50 pm! Which means that everybody SHOULD be in school in the mornings for sports and co-curriculum.

Ingenious, I would say. Except that it makes things veryyyyyy inconvenient for the teachers, and tiring for the students as well. And who’s to say students won’t start skipping the T&L sessions in the afternoon too?? @.@

Today, we had the Sukan Tara. I’ve never really been a fan of sports, or anything that involves sweating, really. Adding to that is the fact that I’m realllyyyyy bad at sports, even when I was in school. I could never really do anything. I couldn’t throw, I couldn’t run. Well, actually, I could, but I was never really the best, and that made me feel like a Nothing—which I hate. T.T Plus, it’s done in front of other students, which makes you open to ridicule and mockery.

Sighhhhh. Can’t you see why I hate it?

Thankfully, this time, I’ll be joining as a teacher. 😛

So didn’t have to run or throw or jump or do anything. All I had to do was supervise the students and make sure they don’t run off somewhere, and that they participate in all the events and contribute to the House points 🙂

I am in Rajawali, or the Green House. And it was actually quite fun watching as a teacher from the sidelines, cheering the students on! 😀 The shot putt and long jump events were fine. I was just very worried for their safety. Students don’t seem to realize the danger they put themselves in if they walk in the path of someone who’s throwing a shot putt, or running down the track at an extremely fast speed! @.@

By the time Rajawali reached the 100 m sprint tracks, the sun was already burning hot! >.< Yikes.

So tiring, really. Sighhhhhhhhhhhhh~ (And this is only Sukan Tara not the actual Sports Day! T.T)

Anyway, imagine the state of the class when you enter after all that vigorous running and throwing and jumping! They are either too active and restless, or too exhausted.

Mine was the former for the first half of the lesson, then the latter for the second =.=

I was doing another PBS evaluation with them today, where they just had to introduce themselves. Give their names and where they’re from. Very simple, because this is only Band 1 (isn’t it silly to be learning how to introduce yourself in the MIDDLE of the school year??! =.=)

Anyway, remembering yesterday’s lesson, I thought I would try to make the lesson more fun and interesting for them. Shake things up a bit, don’t be so serious all the time. So, I created some lots for them to draw from that would dictate the style in which they would introduce themselves! 😀

Let me explain. They have to say two very simple sentences in order to pass this task: Hello, I’m Miss Lisa. I’m from Seremban, Negeri Sembilan. Now, they would also draw a lot to decide what style they would say that in. For example, if I drew “Robot” I would have to say the two sentences—ROBOT-style! xD

I had prepared 12 different styles including “Normal”. We also had “Robot”, “Loud”, “Sad, “Sleepy”, “Baby”, “Cute”, “Old Man/Woman”, “Sick”, “Angry”, “Crazy” and “Slow”. I thought the kids might really enjoy goofing around a little 🙂

So, I called them out, one by one, and initially, they were rather enjoying themselves. They were laughing at each other’s antics and acting. But mostly, I just made sure they were able to introduce their names and where they lived. The rest was just for fun.

However, after about half of the students had gone, they started getting bored again. They weren’t really paying attention, especially when the shy ones were up and they dilly dallied before presenting.

I realized that by adding to this, it makes the process even slower. It certainly takes up more time. Which doesn’t really matter if I had accounted for it. Well, actually, I did, but I didn’t expect it to take up even more time than what I had allocated for it! >.< Plus, it makes the lesson more long-drawn. And once the initial novelty had worn off, it becomes boring once again. T.T

Now, you tell me, what should I do? I’m not sure how to remedy this now. I mean, when I don’t do anything different, the lesson is still too boring and they get restless. But even when I do do something more fun and interesting, it eventually still becomes boring as well!

ARGHHHHHHHHH. Tell me, what should I do? 😦

We didn’t manage to finish all. There are about 10 students left. Now we’ll have to postpone that to another lesson, which, again, will take up time from another lesson that I have already planned nicely. And it might get boring again. What should I do???? @.@

Am not looking forward to tomorrow’s lesson. There’s gonna be sports in the morning again. Will it be the same thing all over? T.T

Today was supposed to be the first time I’m carrying out the PBS evaluations. I had a listening test planned for them. I was nervous that things might not go as planned, but I was hopeful. Besides, I had already informed them that I would be doing the test with them today, so they should behave, right?

When I entered the class at 9.50 am, after their recess, there was practically nobody in the class. I waited as students just trickled in, one by one, right up until 10.00 am. I was getting annoyed. I had a lot to complete with them today, and 10 minutes—gone, just like that! >.<

I was getting antsy, because what I had planned was, that I would deliver the listening test for them where I would read 10 words aloud, and they would circle the words that they hear from a choice of 2 words that are minimal pairs distinguishing between /p/ and /b/. Not only that, in my plan, I thought since it was a listening test of only 10 words which shouldn’t take too long, I thought I would also include a vocabulary lesson. Ss would have to search for the meanings of words from dictionaries I would provide, and write them down on the back of their worksheet.

But how can I start when there are Ss who have not entered the class? @.@

So I decided to begin the lesson by explaining the PBS evaluations again, and what we were going to be doing for the next few weeks. I hoped that those missing would come in by then. :/

Finally, at 10.10 am, Nabihah came in. I was really quite ticked off. Nabihah is one of my favourites, but I cannot be showing favouritism now, can I? Besides, I really was quite ticked off, Nabihah or not. When I asked her why she was late, she said she had come from the library. Now, I knew that she and a few others liked to go to the library during recess. But is that any excuse for why you are entering your English lesson at 10.10 am when it started at 9.50 am??! >.<

And when Hannah and Fatini came in after her, I scolded them too. HALF THE LESSON IS GONE! It breaks my heart to scold them, actually, because they are some of the nice ones. But what choice did I have? They were late, VERY late, and I had to reprimand them.

Another 3 came in even later than them, probably at 10.15 am! Athifah, Namira and Aliah. They said they were prefects and they had duties. But other prefects had come in before them on time, so why them? Then they told me that they were given “special duties” by Mr. Thina (whom I knew was not around today) and were given an extra 10 minutes for recess. To which I answered, “Ten minutes would mean your ‘extra recess’ should have ended at 10.00 am. It is now 10.15 am.”

ARGHHHHHHHHHH. Do things like these happen only to me? Am I the only teacher who has to suffer these kinda nonsense and excuses? Is it because they are not scared of me at all? Am I really such a failure of a teacher????!! T.T

Anyway, because of the delay, I could only start the listening test late, and in the end, I only managed to complete the listening test with them, and not the search-for-meaning activity. However, we did manage to discuss the meanings of the words during the discussion, though I doubt they wrote the meanings at the back of their worksheets.

All of them scored 8/10 and above. But the 3 who scored 8/10 needed to re-do the test: Husna, Hilman and Fadhli. All of them met with me after school and passed the re-test with flying colours! 😀 PHEW.

But I was really quite upset during class today. I don’t know why I’ve been really touchy and sensitive lately. I keep getting angry at them, which is completely what I did not want to do in my last few weeks. I hate to leave with such a bad impression and memories 😦

I’m dreading entering 1 Best’s class nowadays. >.< And you know what’s the “great” news? We’ve just received our latest timetables (due to the new teachers coming in) and now, I’ll be entering 1 Best for Thursday and Friday as well. For the “old” timetable, I entered their class on Mondays, Tuesdays and Wednesdays. But for the new one, I’m supposed to enter Mondays, Thursdays and Fridays. And since the new timetable is put into effect only on Thursday, that means that I’ll be seeing them EVERY DAY this week! And with FOUR EXTRA PERIODS with them this week!!

ARGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH.

Why? Why when my rapport with them is just so terrible? T.T

Day #66 – 18 June 2012

Today was a terrible class with 1 Best! >.<

I entered and they were restless and noisy. Although quite a number of them did not bring their graphic novels, they didn’t seem very bothered about it. They didn’t care that I was going around scolding those who didn’t bring the books.

And Nash, today. OH MY GOODNESS. I asked him to borrow a friend’s book because he and his pair did not bring theirs. I asked him to ask nicely from Amir, who sits on his left. He turned his face away and did not answer me. I seriously got annoyed. It wasn’t the first time he had done this—completely refused to answer me even though I was talking to him. So I called him and demanded that he answer me.

Again, no answer. He didn’t even look at me.

When I asked him to look at me and reply, he did but still, not a single word from his mouth.

I asked him what was the problem. If it was because he didn’t understand me. I even spoke to him in BM at this point. I told him how absolutely rude he was being, and that if truly he could not understand what I was saying, he still had to acknowledge and respond to me by saying, Cikgu, tak faham or SOMETHING you know, so I know he’s heard and understood me. Not look stonily the other way! >.<

Still refused to answer.

When I scolded him some more, then asked him again if he understood, Faham ke tak faham, Nash? He answered Yes, very begrudgingly.

Seriously, what is his problem with me? >.<

ARGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH. I honestly felt so angry I could slap him right then!

But of course I didn’t.

I told him that the next time he did that, I was sending him out of the class.

Anyway, the lesson was just plain boring. I mean, my plan was for students to read the few pages of the chapter silently, we discuss difficult vocab as I retell the story, then make them do the simple exercises in the text book. Then repeat for each chapter.

It was simple, but turned out to be so very difficult to execute! >.<

They were restless and kept talking. I had to keep shouting over their voices to be heard. Some were trying to listen. Some were sleeping off. Some just weren’t bothered.

I don’t know what’s the matter with me as well. I was angry about it, but didn’t do anything about it. I mean, what’s the point? I feel like I’ll get angry and scold/nag them, then I’ll get upset, then I won’t feel like teaching anymore. I felt like just sitting down at the teacher’s table and resting my throbbing head. And resting my voice. My throat was getting a little sore already. Which is worrying indeed, since everybody in school seems to be sick. Sun herself is just recovering from fever and losing her voice just last week.

I hated it. I honestly felt like just walking out of the class and not looking back at all. I did not want to be in class. >.<

There were some who were responsive when I quizzed them on the events in the chapter, which I am grateful for, really. But it also made the class really noisy and a little out-of-control. I realized this happens when I address the question to the whole class. They all answer at the same time, making everything really messy and noisy.

So I tried addressing one person at a time, choosing those who seemed to be not paying attention. But that just made the rest noisier because I was focusing on only one student.

Maybe I should try asking one students to answer, then another to repeat what his friend had just said? But that would take up even more time than my nagging already did, and I don’t think I can go any slower now. Because it’s a graphic novel, there are very few pages with words really. So it should be easier and I should finish faster, shouldn’t I? @.@

My plans were to go through about 3 chapters a week and finish the novel in a month. Isn’t that already kind of a long time? >.<

I don’t know! I’m not too sure how to teach the novel. It’s pretty overwhelming :/

I really need to switch up my methods for teaching this by this week. I definitely have to do this a little differently next week. I don’t think I can experience a lesson like this one again! >.<

I was so exhausted, and by the end of it, I just really felt like bursting into tears. My head hurts, my eyes are tired, my feet are aching. I just want to go back to my room, throw all my bags in a corner, and just take a nice long nap. (Maybe I’m sounding a little cranky because I’ve just had a really busy weekend what with church stuff and Father’s Day and all. It has seriously affected me more than I expected it to.)

And it doesn’t help that I have to stay back again today because of Choir training for the competition this Saturday (which I only found out today!) ARGHHHHHHHHHHHHH. What is happening????!!! T________T

Anyway, this was one of my worst lessons ever. I don’t know what to do! I’m so tired I can’t really think straight! T.T

 

Maybe it’s the right decision not going for the A (a second time) because, at this point, I am in serious doubt as to whether I am A-grade material. 😦

Day #63 – 13 June 2012

Sun is sick today. She didn’t come to school. It’s not the first time I’m going to school alone, and we don’t always have free periods at the same time, but still, it feels kinda lonely without her :/ (She has fever and has lost her voice. Poor thing! >.<)

Anyway, had class with 1 Best in the morning—the second and third period. I was going to finish discussing Paper 2, which includes Section B and C.

No problems today. I explained the Literature section, provided the answers that I could accept, and those that I couldn’t. Explained why, of course. Was a bit disappointed with their performance in this section though. The first question was about the poem The River, which I did not do with them (the previous teacher was supposed to have done), but it was a relatively easy poem, indeed. Still, they weren’t able to score 3 out of 3 marks. A simple question like, “Who is ‘he’ in the poem?” and the couldn’t answer! >.<

And for the second question, I had already given them the model essay answers for the themes and their favourite character in the short story Flipping Fantastic. I didn’t give them handouts to just paste into their books. I made them copy the model essays into their books so that they would remember the points and examples. Apparently, that’s neither enough for it to get into their heads, nor for them to take the hint! >.< Sigh. I don’t know what else to do with them, I really don’t. :/

Section C, summary writing, was alright, I suppose. Some of them did well. Most were okay, scoring about 6 or 7 marks out of 10, which isn’t too bad. Mostly, they missed out one or two points, then got about 3 marks on average for their language (I was rather lenient, I think @.@). But I was very displeased with those who wrote more than 60 words—some up to 80+! I had already warned them, and nagged them, not to do that because the instructions are to keep it not more than 60 words. Why are they so darn stubborn?! >.<

When I was done discussing the 5 main points from the text given, and explaining the marking scheme to them, I gave them the rest of the time to do their corrections. I opened up the teacher’s table for them to come and ask me questions about the marking, about their mistakes and how to correct them.

Surprisingly, quite a lot of them came to ask about the corrections. Of course, there were those who couldn’t care less about correcting their errors, which is completely expected. But I still felt a little surprised when there were a few of the boys who came to ask and, from their responses, seemed to have actually been listening when I was explaining certain errors yesterday, as well! 😀 I am very glad. Hopefully, it’s not just a temporary thing (but somehow I feel it is. Or a one-off occasion =.=)

Anyway, a rather good, controlled class. Not too bad 🙂 And PHEW! Done with discussing Mid-Year papers with 1 Best! It’s 1 Buck’s turn tomorrow 😛

Day #62 – 12 June 2012

Class was a little more subdued today, surprisingly.

Maybe because they didn’t do so well for Paper 2 :/ Quite a number of them actually scored less than half the marks! >.< I did try very hard to give them marks where I could, but for most of them, their first essay—the guided writing—really pulled their marks down. That was because they didn’t write enough. Pn. Kartini had already told me that if they wrote half a page or less, they cannot get more than 15 marks. Many of them did exactly that! 😦

Since it was a single period, I had to rush a little. First, I explained the marking scheme for the essay (I always feel that they should know) which included the annotations to indicate missing words, errors of spelling/grammar etc. They are supposed to figure out why it’s wrong and correct it themselves.

I did not really agree with this PMR-style of marking, where the teacher does not correct the essays, but rather merely points out where it’s wrong. Sometimes students try to find out why they’ve gotten it wrong, but sometimes, they just don’t bother. They may never know why it’s wrong because they don’t bother to find out! >.< However, I have to admit that it did make my marking a little easier and faster. Which makes sense, especially if you’re marking 5 classes’ answer scripts! @.@

Anyway, I pointed out and discussed some common errors that they made in their essays. For example, the difference between “policeman” and “policemen” (yes, some don’t seem to know, writing “a policemen” in their essays!) and that a word like “explained” needs to be followed by the preposition “to” while words like “told” “praised” and “thanked” cannot. I also gave them some words that were considered good, and could be used in their essays. Descriptive words like, “cute baby”, “shady/sturdy tree”, “kind-hearted”, “responsible” and “caring”.

Hopefully, it helps them. And I really hope they do their corrections!

They’re supposed to hand in all their exercise books, including their journals, tomorrow for marking and Inspection. I wonder how many actually will? @.@

btw, this was a gift from Pn. Koh to Sun and I from Sabah—pearl bracelets! 😀